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I live in a retirement community with communal dining. The dining room is not really formal, but it is quiet and seemly. Last night, a couple was visiting with two children about 4 and 7, I'm guessing. They were yelling loudly things like "I want mac and cheese;" "I want grilled cheese" and also just yelling suddenly. I believe they were trying to get attention from their mother. Finally, I turned to the mother who was sitting behind me and said, You need to take the children out and settle them down. Her response was: "Do you want to do it?" I kind of wish I had taken her up on it, but figured I'd get sued if I did, so I just said back to her that I didn't think she really wanted me to do that. Later, her husband did take the children out after a number of people just turned to stare at them.
We have children come to visit residents all the time and in the five years we have been here I have never had a complaint about any of them, so I'm think I was not out of line, but what do you think?
You were certainly not out of line, but I'm afraid it was a lost cause. Why this kind of situation is encountered fairly frequently is a puzzle. Are these adults totally unfit to be raising children? Bad enough that it is an annoyance to others - one wonder what kinds of adults these children will become.
Good for you. The children need to learn what a guest does or doesn't do. Probably won't happen.
I don't think you were being unreasonable or out of line at all. Parents should teach their children manners, home manners and public manners. It could have been a very lovely visit if the children were more respectful of others.
I can't understand how people think letting their children behave like that is acceptable. What chaotic homes and lives they must have. If no one comments on the bad behaviour presumably the parents think it is OK. The more people who make it clear that bad behaviour in a public place is unacceptable, the more chance there is (I hope) of the parents doing something about it.
Please note that I do not intend this to apply to the parents of children whose behaviour is due to a medical condition. That's quite different.
A lady with a young child called us once and said come and help me I cannot get her to do something, don't remember what it was. She was around 8 and we said now if you cannot get her to mind you at this age, you will probably be calling the police when she gets around 13. How sad when people do not train their children. It is not only sad for the child but for the people who are around her.
There are many people who think that the sun shines out of their kids' rear ends. There children are perfect, can do nothing wrong, and the thought of reining them in at all is an anathema to them. If anyone dares object to the child's behavior, the parent's glare and often give rude or aggressive responses. And the reason for all this is the ever-growing mindset that disciplining or controlling your children in any way is a form of abuse.
My girls were taught at a very early age how to behave in public. It's not that difficult (mind you this was over 30 years ago).
This was a situation that your management should have been alerted to. That is what you pay for. It is their job to let the resident who had the offending guess know that this is not okay and to not let it happen again. :thumbdown:
My nephews were taught how to behave both at home and when out in public and it is a pleasure to be with them. Their parents would never let them disturb others. Good behaviour is still being taught but I suppose the well behaved children are so much less noticeable than the badly behaved ones.
And how awful for the kids involved. Why would any parent want their children to be disliked, avoided, and unwelcome. What are they thinking?
It's just easier to let them run rampant than to take the time to teach them. My children and grands were taught early on that if they acted up in public, it would be a loooong time before they were allowed out again. If they even started to whine I would only have to ask once if they wanted to go out to the car and have a conversation on their hind ends!
The response of the mother says it all! How rude of her.
This reminds me of an occasion when some children (probably 8 years old up to 14) were getting out of a minibus with their father. The oldest boy was shouting 4 letter words and being thoroughly objectionable. My husband asked the man if he would tell the boy to moderate his language. The response? "You should be glad he didn't smash your car windows!" Oh yes, I'm very grateful that you have brought up children to behave in such a manner.
My Daughter was taught very early on how to behave in public. I have always been very proud of her and I know she will teach her little a Girl the same.
I feel sorry for Children who have no discipline , it makes them very unlikeable, but really it is the Parents that are to blame.